What To Do When You “Just Ain’t Feelin’ It”
Being an entrepreneur is a rollercoaster: we have swirling high highs and we can have pretty devastating lows as well (just being honest).
I’ve been there and I’m sure that you have been, too; that awful place where you “just ain’t feelin’ it.” One day you’re still “fine”, the next you feel drained and don’t feel like doing anything, you don’t want to get out of bed, you find yourself questioning everything you do. With that, you can feel your mental energy crash against a wall of resistance. After all, you are an entre-preneur meaning literally: you undertake things, you are a do-er. So it feels pretty inauthentic to find yourself at the other side of your purpose.
So now what?
There was a time when I was convinced that it was “weak” to have a -or a few- bad days and I would fight it with my willpower and everything else I could come up with. Now, I know better; fighting this feeling works in the opposite direction.
Instead, the first thing I started doing was listening to my language to pick up the signals sooner. Whenever I started talking or thinking in terms of:
- “I have to…”
- “I need to…”
- “I should…” (can you hear it too?)
… I noticed that it was not in alignment with my passion and enthusiastic drive, that it was time to refuel my lamp so I could shine bright again.
… I felt that I was pushing myself too much and ignoring signals, I was acting from a place of “shortness” instead of “abundance”.
… I started resenting my life’s work; the work I’m so passionate about.
I became aware that when I was speaking this “language of willpower” as I call it, all I was looking at were even “more things on my plate.” Are you with me?
It’s so easy to get stuck in all the “doing” when you stop “being.”
So actually, it’s simple. Start talking a supportive language. Tell yourself:
- “I can…”
- “I love to…”
- “I want to…”
- “I choose to…”
Whole different sound and feeling huh?
And hey, sometimes I too forget to remind myself that I can talk this language. We’re cut of the same wood, you and me. But practicing helps. No one is perfect!
The other thing I learned is, that it works to give myself the permission to not feel at my best for a moment, to perceive it as a valuable signal that I need to disconnect to re-connect. BUT… that it is essential to take full responsibility and turn that feeling around asap.
The less you “have to”, the more you “can do.”
How you can unite these two opposites, you may be wondering?
Allow yourself to take some time to…
- really “be” with yourself: make a “to-be” list instead of your next to-do list. What makes you feel connected within?
- do whatever you feel like doing (or not): disconnect a few days from work and only do what you want to do, nothing else.
- inspire yourself: read, take long walks, get together with a friend, dream, envision, listen to some motivating and uplifting audio’s
- have fun with silly stuff: fiddle around in the kitchen to make a recipe you wanted to try since a long time, do something with your hands, plant something, sing
When?
- First of all: I gave myself the permission to disconnect and take the time I needed to refuel
- I talked to an old friend I hadn’t seen in a year about completely different things than I use to talk about over a lovely raw lunch at my place
- I invited the kids and their loved ones over the weekend
- We went disco bowling together for my sister’s birthday and had a lot of silly fun
- We went on a challenging 4 hour hike in the woods, swirling streams and deep sticky mud (oh what fun to walk, climb, jump and get dirty!)
- I made yummy stuff and we had a glorious picknick in the wind and rain under a small picknick roof
- Then I allowed myself to rest for 2 days and lounge, read, study, envision new perspectives and getting inspired all over again
- In the meantime, I did a 3 day detox: that helped me to reset all my “energy buttons”
This brings me to the following thought:
How can we appreciate big things in our business and life when we forget to appreciate the small stuff… The more you can “be”, the more you can do and achieve. A happier you is a more productive expert.
Is this helpful for you? Let me know what you took away from this post, in the comment section below or write me at marieclaire@ravishingraw.com.
Oh and… just in case you can’t (yet): I am giving YOU full permission to do less and be more whenever you need this to feel at your best asap!
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